This weekend, Toronto is anticipating up to 30 centimetres of snow or, as Winnipeg calls it, “a light dusting.” While everybody here stocks up on canned goods and firewood, I thought I’d outline a few things you could do to keep you occupied during the Snow-pocalypse.
1. TV marathon
What better way to spend a day where other chumps are angrily digging their cars out of snowbanks than with mainlining your favorite TV shows? The Real Housewives of Vancouver just started up again, and full episodes from Season 1 (and the first from Season 2) are up in Slice.ca’s video centre. A few episodes of an addictive TV show and some food delivery are a perfect way to demolish a day. Speaking of food:
2. Cook something low and slow
A snowed-in day is the perfect time to throw a bunch of stuff in a pot and let it cook away for hours. Chopping aside (Oh, tedious, tedious chopping), this is the laziest way to produce impressive results, and only improves the longer you wait. Try this Pasta with Tomato Braised Beef Shanks — you literally do nothing for hours and it turns out hearty and delicious. That’s my kind of cooking.
3. Play an offensive board game with your significant other
Have you played Cards Against Humanity yet? Oh, it’s a delight. A depraved, in-poor-taste delight. I was at a comedy festival last summer when a few of the performers busted this out before a show. We eventually got so into it we didn’t want to go onstage so we could keep playing. It’s not for the easily offended, but this game could bring you and significant other together over gasps of horror and uncontrollable laughter.
4. Solve a cold case
When it’s cold outside, it’s time to hunker down and solve a cold case. Did you know they never caught the Zodiac killer? One of his cyphers that’s never been decoded. Crack open a bottle of wine and have at it. Or: crack open a bottle of wine and just watch Zodiac.
5. Read our blog posts
What better time to catch up on my hilarious blog posts (and all the other fantastic content we produce) than when snowed in? So much laughter and insight to bring warmth to your cold, snow-bound day.
Paul Beer is a Toronto writer, actor and comedian. You can follow him on Twitter@pauldanielbeer.